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Suicide on What You Thought Was a Sunny Day

imageSuicide. If you are living with or caring for someone with depression, suicide can be part of the equation. Some individuals live with suicidal thoughts day in and day out. Some never have them. And then there are those who have suicidal thoughts when you least expect.

The day might have been going well. In fact, you as caregiver and loving support, might have even had the thought that things had turned a corner, that perhaps depression was on its way out of the picture. Then, out of the blue, your loved one says to an innocent question about how things were going, that he/she is considering suicide. Then come tumbling out the words that everything would be so much better if he/she were not in the picture, that it would be so much easier to just end all these crazy thoughts and feelings, that suicide seemed the way to go.

After you pick yourself up off the floor, you look at your loved one. You remember the good feelings you had earlier that day about how you might have turned a corner, leaving depression behind. Now your heart is in your throat and you can barely get the words out to counteract the craziness.

Anyone who claims they have the answer to depression or those who list step by step instructions for overcoming depression have probably never experienced it in a loved one. Depression is unpredictable, making you think everything is good one minute and falling apart the next. Depression can rob a person of any type of feeling and when feelings do arise in the depressed one, depression turns those feelings around so that the only way of dealing with them are thoughts of suicide.

And so my loved one and I talk and we contact the doctor. We face the thoughts of suicide head on. And paraphrasing the words of writer Og Mandino, we guard our fragile life carefully. Only God can shape a flower but depression can pull it to pieces.

-Bernadette

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5 Responses

  1. Such an important post…….glad you faced it head on because you have to. Wishing you all the best…..

  2. Such a hard topic to write about, but kudos to you for tackling it, head on, like the thoughts. My thoughts are with you both x

  3. I know I keep sending these and haven’t asked if you like them. But each time I just think of you and it might give some support or encouragement. Just reminds me of things you have said! Thanks for coming yesterday. It was good to meet for even just an hour. But it feels too short! Have a good weekend

    Sonja Arnold http://www.lifecoachingplus.wordpress.com 214-779-4115 Moving forward in freedom on your journey

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